Question

How can I simulate a bain-marie when I only possess

• a saucepan
• a frying pan
• a wok
• some small bowls
• three sieves of varying sizes?

I have a few other sundry items which would probably not help.

I think I’ve got cradle cap.

I spent much of the morning and afternoon very pissed off at having to attend a two and half hour bullshit presentation, involving

1. the use of the word “leverage” during the “get to know me” segment;
2. showing us our own company’s adverts – sorry, those are for the dumb consumers, remember? We know what we’re doing here;
3. break-out sessions, as opposed to Breakout sessions which would have been better;
4. a timespan considerably longer than was initially indicated;
5. me thinking “this is bullshit, this is bullshit, I don’t care, I hate my job” continually;
6. relentless emphasis on structural changes without mentioning, say, how they would affect little things like process and workflow, which is what people who actually work as opposed to manage care about;
7. a free lunch that I didn’t have time to attend

Because of my foul mood I ended up doing very little of the work that I really, really need to do this week. I returned, ate lunch at my desk and then sank into alternately thinking about exactly what was wrong with said presentation and wishing I had some more coffee.

Well, you know. Sod it. With the number of pointless reorganisations EvilMegaCorporation has had over the past few years (reassigning all Death Star staff to Orbital Services, outsourcing Mind-Control Vaccine And Fluoridation activities to EvilButDeniableSmallerCorporation™ and so on) I am so jaded by the whole process that I assume that things will basically work exactly the same as before, with a load of new acronyms. I am confident that history will prove me right.

As Sarah Connor’s friend Nancy said, “in a hundred years who’s gonna care?”