DNC Report, Day Two

Well, nothing terribly exciting happened today, unfortunately. Most of the time I was hitting other bloggers with sticks so that they wouldn’t swamp my wifi connection while trying to download porn. You know what these people are like. Security had to eject a couple.

This morning I spent nearly an hour telling Bill Clinton how he could make some of his Livejournal entries friends-only. For a smart guy it took him long enough to grasp the basic concept. Then I had some guy – can’t remember his name, sounded like Osama – telling me how his inbox was always full of viruses and camgirls. I was on my fourth or fifth Bloody Mary by then, it was 11am, and I think I just told him to fuck off and buy a Mac. I don’t think he was anyone important.

After that I went back to the hotel for a doze, and only really emerged this evening to go to a few parties, which were just the usual – holding back ###’s hair and so on (my Internet Lawyers advised me to redact that particular name). Apart from Matt Drudge trying to put ice cubes down a waitress’ pants, nothing eventful occurred. I think he may get bitter about being slapped for that.

Incidentally, Janeane Garofolo has a lemur that she carries on her shoulder to social events, but it’s quite a small one and well-behaved.